Thursday, May 17, 2018

Twelve Golden Windows and Capes, Coffee Shops & Cake: Opening Scenes


 Capes, Coffee Shops & Cake is dual narrated. And the story alternates between Kace's story and Lily's (though they both appear in the others...) Kace's POV begins the story in Capes, Coffee Shops & Cake and Lily's ends it. In the sequel, Lily begins and it's during Kace's POV that the story wraps up. 










I peered over the side of the rooftop and down at the streets. Nothing. The whole city was bathed in shadows and the streets of New York were dark and grey, coupled with the wet snowy weather added to the overall gloominess of the evening. The tall black lamp posts lined the streets like silent sentinels, illuminating small circles on the ground. Snow flakes danced through the light beam and disappeared as they moved back into the darkness.

The roads were covered in the odd discolored slush of old snow and too many cars and the wind was biting through my coat and making the skin along my spine tingle.
Still nothing.

Thanks to the weather everyone was bundled up inside. Occasionally a car would zip by, carrying someone to a late New Year’s party. But now the street and sidewalks below were empty. Everyone and everything was sleeping.

Which makes sense, considering it was three in the morning of the day winter break ended and we were all forced to return to school. But the criminals are normally out every night, selling drugs and mugging people. It seemed that the cold had made even them crawl back into their holes.

Babies.

I pulled my phone out and cradled it in my hands. My fingerless gloves were made for gripping and climbing, so technically there was no reason to scoot back from the edge. But the last thing I wanted was to drop my phone several stories down and onto the pavement. Again.

Still. Nothing. 




Twelve Golden Windows is ALSO dual narrated (which is kind of odd...most of my stories are told through single narration. No wait. That USED to be it...now it's about 50/50...or maybe 40/60)



There was once a girl. She lived in the great marble city with her beloved parents, the kind Sultan and the wise Princess. But a sickness swept through the land the royal couple was counted among the dead and the whole city mourned.  Once the morning period had ended, it was their young daughter who was given the throne. Everyone said she would make a good ruler, for she was just as wise as her mother and kind of his father.
But she was young and scared.


Once there was a girl who became a sultana.
 Once there was a sultana who was cursed.















Of course, this is just the beginning of my second draft work and as you may be able to see from, you know, basically every post I've ever written, I don't edit things the first time I write them...Or the second apparently.


The first one is a little longer because it's actually the beginning of a chapter and the second is more of a cute little insert before chapter one...


Which one did you like better?


MK

11 comments:

  1. I like both! They are both really good, and make me want to keep reading.

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  2. THEY'RE BOTH SO EPIC!!!

    I can't choose because they're so different from each other. With Capes, Coffee Shops, and Cakes, it has that contemporary vibe and the girl is so epic. She's all like, "I'm gonna kick you butt."

    But with Twelve Golden Windows, it has that fantasy vibe of a girl trapped in a destiney she might not be confident in.

    AAAAHHHH, YOU ARE SO GOOD!!!!

    I love them both so much.

    AND LOOK AT THAT I'M FINALLY EARLY!!!

    (It's my day off, thank goodness. I am exhausted.)

    Awesome writing, girl! You are going places! <3

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    1. Work is exhausting. WHY DIDN'T ANYONE WARN US THAT ADULTHOOD WOULD BE THIS HARD?

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    2. YES, RIGHT?? LIKE, WHY LIFE GOTTA BE LIKE THAT?? XD

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  3. I personally prefer Capes Coffee Shops and Cake's snippet better, much more realistic and intriguing.

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    Replies
    1. Same...The TGW one is very "tell" and not "show"...
      Which is kind of what I was trying to do for a bit of a fairy tale vibe...but it needs work.

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